2015
3:00 PM
SATURDAY SAT
Larry Mathers Softball Classic
15th ANNUAL PEDIATRICS DEPARTMENT SOFTBALL CONTEST
June 18, 2015
With the rapidly approaching 15th Annual Mathers Classic, set for 3pm THIS SATURDAY at Beautiful Baylands Park, you couldn’t miss the near-palpable excitement wherever Faculty and Housestaff gathered. After weeks of preparation, security remained tight as both squads put the finishing touches on starting lineups. Interrupted while feeding the pitching machine at a closely guarded Faculty practice diamond hidden behind construction barriers somewhere on campus, Faculty Coach, Steve Alexander slowly shook his head in admiration:
“I have to hand it to the Housestaff this year,” smiled Alexander. “We’ve been looking for their practices for months, and we just can’t find them! It’s especially frustrating after our GM spent all that money on surveillance cameras, and even sent John Kerner to train with the CIA.”
“Fortunately, Hugh got a good deal on the equipment,” added Kerner, trotting in from center field where he had been chasing fly balls while dodging cranes swinging steel beams. “The Patriots were selling off last year’s hidden camera models on E-Bay. The Pats have a whole page of espionage equipment for sale, even little metal things that you use to deflate stuff."
"We found a great way to hide the cameras," chuckled Alexander. "Who’d ever suspect a little red wagon? “
“What worries me most is how little we know about the new interns,” interjected Faculty reliever, Arun Gupta. “By now we should at least have seen one or two in the clinics, but all I’ve seen are those tiny touched up, air brushed head shots Becky circulates. “
“That’s because they’re hiding them somewhere until game time,” explained Alexander, ruefully. “I hear it’s the Rosewood… which is why the Faculty hasn’t seen them. I guess it's the only way to recruit the top Housestaff talent these days. John Mark says back when we had new interns actually start work in June, we kept losing the blue chip candidates to places like Cincinnati and Seattle where all interns start out with a 4-week "orientation elective" at the 5-Star resort of their choice."
"We owe it all to the new Housestaff Wellness Program," Shrugged Kerner. "Laura and Caroline were first to realize that new interns are all coming off their 4th year of medical school, their easiest, most relaxed year since pre-school. Many have even taken another year off riding zip lines in Costa Rica. The shock of real work on the wards in June was just too much for them, and word got around that Stanford Peds was tough on interns. That's all changed now that the program has learned that intern wellness doesn't happen by accident....it takes a lot of time poolside or on the Stanford golf course or hiking the Dish with John. Just check out the Housestaff website: ever see any photos of residents at work?"
"You know, the past couple of years I HAVE noticed a steady increase in the overall quality of each new intern class," mused Gupta. "I thought it was better teaching in medical school, but it's obviously just selection bias...we're getting better applicants, and now I know why!"
Tired of idle chatter, Kerner shouted as he jogged back to center field: “Well, interns or no interns, we better be prepared for Saturday. They haven’t forgotten last year, and neither should we.”
The 15th Annual Modern Pediatrics Faculty/Housestaff Larry Mathers Softball Classic will be played this Saturday, June 20, 2015. First pitch is set for 3:00pm. The Official Rules for the game are attached to this note. The game will be played at Beautiful Baylands Park. Take Embarcadero East from Stanford towards the Bay. Go over HWY 101 to the second stop light, which will be Geng Road. Turn left and go to the end of the road. Park behind the baseball stadium and walk to the softball field located behind baseball's right field fence. All are urged to attend.
Location
1900 Geng Road
Palo Alto, CA 94303
USA
Get Directions
Larger
Mathers Baseball Team from 2014
See you there!